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12 March, 2007 - Leslie Irene/Still Sparkling
"It is hard sometimes, but it's like Hamlet..."to be or not to be...?"
~ Leslie Irene
Leslie Irene Latimer, a dear friend recently passed away after a long illness. She was a presence on the Diaryland.com website and quite popular. While her journal is no longer posted or appearing on this website I felt it appropriate to write about her.
For several years we corresponded and even exchanged gifts. I intended on visiting her when I came out to California this year. The past several years I was, at that time and place, not doing well. Overall I was in an unhealthy situation. Such seemed like a domino effect at the time, though I am whole now. She was always supportive, loving and kind to me. After hurricane Katrina struck my hometown New Orleans, she called me and despite her illness and limited resources offered me money and anything else she could to be of assistance. She was the only person to act with such selflessness and unconditional love and support to me.
We kept in touch despite her illness and her backing away from websites, postings, journals and blogs online due to her illness. Someone else close to me, Eric, who passed on in 2004, we had kept a dialogue despite his illness. I love him like a father and mean that with all my being that he is family to me. I say love and not loved as I am still alive and my love is not something of the past. Only when one "thinks" and uses psychological time can such violent ideology come about. I do not grieve them as the love in my heart is still there. I question constantly if I am blooming.
After Katrina I did not accept any money from Leslie, but I did accept her kindness and a continued but closer line of dialogue. While we are alive we are all apart of one another, it is only within this physical time that we can come to be aware of such. Division in all its various forms breeds conflict and violence. If we as human beings can communicate with selfless loving-kindness and sincerity to others, that is to act with love, then do whatever you will. Such will always bring right action.
I write about Leslie whom is my friend, whom did not have any division of me that I am an "internet person" or anything such. For Leslie, there isn't any division between any of us. I was not a symbol, the past, a label, the known, or anything of such, but another human being who she communicated to with actual dialogue. That being where I can listen to her and she can listen to me and we can see between one another so there is not any division.
There are those online, possibly even you the reader and others that I care about, and care about deeply with all my being, but do not communicate in such a manner. While such is what it is, I am open and with love, not divided. We have the capacity to change, to communicate and feel wonderful everyday and it not to be an illusion. That is to give and receive love, it is possible. Communication does not have to be argument. Only if that is the way you see it, as you are what you observe and perceive. You see it as an argument and you will make it such. So take action and be that which you can be.
So I ask you if you do or do not 'know' me, to contact me and leave judgment and the measurement of the mind drop and fall like a leave in autumn. Knowledge is not a prerequisite of dialogue, communication, being, living, love, kindness, sincerity and bliss. Here I am open, open to listen, to love and be, just be. Yes and being open to all and everything.
Thank you Leslie, thank you for being you. With unconditional love to all,
Here is an article on Leslie Irene that I found online:
Leslie Irene Latimer of Fresno expressed her love of music and humanity as an accomplished flutist and volunteer who helped patients undergoing chemotherapy.
Mass will be celebrated at 10 a.m. today at Sacred Heart Catholic Church.
Ms. Latimer had played as as principal flutist with the Fresno State Wind Ensemble, and sang in the Sacred Heart choir. She earned her bachelor's degree from California State University, Fresno.
"She was a fine young woman, a wonderful player and musician," said Larry Sutherland, Fresno State director of bands emeritus. "She doubled on piccolo."
Ms. Latimer practiced with the wind ensemble five days a week.
Sutherland recalled her playing the famous piccolo solo during performances of John Philip Sousa's "Stars and Stripes Forever."
Just as noteworthy, he said, she performed with ensembles at music conferences on campus, elsewhere in Fresno, in Carnegie Hall in New York as well as on tours to China, Japan and England.
Lupus attacked her in the late 1980s, her sister, Lori Parker, said. Lupus, an auto-immune disease, can cause painful inflammation in tissue. Up to 1.5 million Americans have been diagnosed with it.
Jim O'Connor directed Ms. Latimer in church choirs and in high school when he was a band and choral director.
"She was a very good flutist, not only at our church but also in high school at San Joaquin Memorial," O'Connor said.
She worked as a project coordinator with Rex Moore Electrical Contractors and Engineers until lupus forced her to stop.
Parker said that Ms. Latimer made it a practice to put others first. Parker cited, for example, Ms. Latimer's self-motivation in working with patients undergoing chemotherapy. The arduous treatment is sometimes administered to patients with lupus as well as cancer.
"She would order little gifts and give them to patients," Parker said. "She did it all on her own. She did all she could while she was able."
That was before the lupus brought about arthritis and then assaulted some of Ms. Latimer's organs, Parker said.
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